I sigh and grab for a cup and some cocoa powder. It's too late now.  I offer some to my mentor, Diamond. Today Dia has decided to stay in my dorm and "train me on myself". Whatever that's supposed to mean. My arm lays on the table, opened up for surgery. The metal pieces unfold like paper to Dia as she takes them out. Her expression looks pretty shocked when she finds what's actually hidden in there. Being without the arm on me, I start to experience some ghost pains from the little stub that's left of my actual arm. Dia sets aside the weapon from the actual parts of the arm and puts it on the table. Out comes an ax, a knife, a gun, some chained hammers, a couple spiked bats, and then some; its surprising to see what all was jam packed in that thing. I dig through the medicine cabinet beside the one I was already in and find some medication. Good, the pain was starting to sting a little bit. "Will it actually help?" Dia asks without even really looking at what I'm grabbing. "It won't help if I don't try." I say and smile.
I offer to make some tea or something for her. She looks shocked that I did that and accepts my offer, smiling back for a moment. "Alright, I think that's it." She says and showcases her job. "Wow." I say as I look at the organized sets of weapons and arm parts. It didn't take her that long to get all that out. "So, what's the point of all this?" I ask and sit down beside her. I can't take my eyes off of all those weapons that were hidden inside of me. What did they do to me? "Be honest. You didn't know all this was actually there, did you?" She asks all smug like. I laugh a little and reply, "I had no clue." picking up a small knife and flicking it out. I start flailing my arm around, but Dia grabs my hand and snatches the knife away. "Sorry!" I squeal and look down at the table ashamed. She sighs and speaks, "listen, you don't fully understand the potential you have been gifted with. This arm, is beyond standard technology. I noticed this earlier, but, now seeing all this, I now realize there is a lot more we're going to need to train on." She shakes her head and counts all the weapons. I stand up again and go to another cabinet. I reach with my stub and laugh. Dia looks back surprised by the sudden break of silence. "Sorry! I just- it's been so long since I've actually gone as normal Jordalina. I haven't gone without that arm in so long... now I'm trying to open a cabinet with this stub!" I say and start laughing again, but she isn't laughing along with. I guess it wasn't that funny.
I pull out a box of processed cookies and offer some to Dia. She looks at them with a mixed expression of worry and suspicion. "Do you always eat this kind of junk?" She asks me and takes the box. Please don't start looking at the nutritional value. You already know it's unhealthy; what's the point of looking at the numbers? She looks at the facts and stands from her chair. Taking the food into the kitchen, she drops the container into the trash. "Hey! That was a new container!" I start yelling, but the expression on Dia's face shuts me up quick. I bow repeatedly and sit back down at the table. Dia sits down beside me and starts tinkering again. While she does so, she asks me about my arm, "mind if I ask you... how you came to be like this?" It's a strange way to ask, but I reply all the same.

     

        She's a monster. Uncontrollable.
     It's been a couple ruff years since Dad, Nico, Nero, and Nekida. It's hard to explain to you, unless I tell you the whole story. So, I guess I will.

I met her late at night. Mamma and Daddy were well known for their charity parties because, at the time, everyone needed help. It was getting late, and a bunch of people grouped in one place late at night with nothing to defend themselves; it was a bad idea and a good opportunity for the monsters lurking in the woods. We all packed our things and cleaned up the leftovers. Just before night fell, we were already on our way walking home. All ten of us. Letrelle, Odessa, Renell, me, Jamal, Nero, Nico, Nekida, Mamma, and Daddy.
     Our house was a mansion. It had to be to hold a family our size. There were three stories and a basement. The oldest of the bunch sleeping higher up and, as the age went down, so did the floor. That night everyone was forced to sleep early. Mamma said she had no interest in dealing with a sugared up bunch of wild kids, and, if we don't go to sleep, we better pretend. I hated sleeping alone. I had just upgraded into my own upstairs room and actually was given a bed to myself. But the room was too dark, and I didn't like the howling sounds from outside. Our house was barricaded to perfection, but my imagination didn't fail to scare me senseless.
     Hiding at the top of the staircase leading to the main floor, I saw when Mamma and Daddy walked to the door to check out what all the ruckus was coming from. The door opens, but I couldn't see what was at it. When it's night, it's pitch black outside. That night was no exception. I could hear them ask where her parents were. But I heard no reply. "Come on in. You look hurt. Let me get you something. Are you hungry?" Daddy asks her as she walked in. I could only see her small silhouette as it waltzed in, following Mamma and Daddy.
They walked into the kitchen. I climb further down the stairs as they walk past to get a better view. I watched Daddy go through our emergency supplies. The plastic ripped completely as Daddy opened a pack of bandages. I didn't even hear a scream or whimper as I watched the alcohol pour over her body. I hear the sizzle of food cooking as Mamma wraps the bandages all around her. "I'm going to visit the neighbors to see if they have any burn ointment." Daddy tells Mamma. He stops cooking and headed back to the door. I scrambled to get back to the top of the stairs as he left the house, locking the door behind him. I heard Mamma call out as he left, "be careful! I love you!"
Mamma went to a back room and left a plate of food in front of the girl; she looked my age. no older, but she was so small she seemed younger. I climb back down and watched as she scoffed down the food in just seconds. Her bony body explained why she would eat like that. When she finished, she just sat there, but her attention soon turned to me. She stood up. Her walk was weak and wobbly, yet I was so intimidated. She stops at the bottom of the staircase and stares at me. This part of the house was so dark I could only make out those horrifyingly sharp green eyes. Then, I saw her hand reach up towards me. Bloody and bony it tried to grab me. I screamed and ran back up the stairs to my room.

I take a deep breath and think of something else. My family. I miss them so much. I wonder what they'd be doing now. I go in order in my head. Through all the memories.

     Letrelle, our brother, hated me, mainly because he was praying for a younger brother. Maybe another time. Each and everyone of us were forced to play soccer. Letrelle, loved it but the rest of us hated it. Le had an advantage in sports since he could manipulate any muscle or bone in his body. He always made his leg muscles super strong so he could out run or out-sprint people in sports.
Le and Chrixten had some kind of connection like they were meant to be siblings. They hung out more than Le and I ever did. And we're blood for heavens sake, we're forced to hang together.

The second oldest sister was Odessa. Odessa was a very quiet girl who could see into the future. She's so wise and pretty. And so tall, which was weird because no one else was that way, tall. She'd always warn me of something stupid I was about to do before I did it, but I never listened after all the times she was right because no one can predict the future.

The third oldest was Renell. She was the jokester/prankster. Always making a joke to get on Chrixten's nerves. Maybe that's why I loved her so much. Also she was hilarious to me. She was the party thrower who got us all into trouble too. She never stopped throwing those unexpected parties. She was great at running away when she got into trouble, all she had to do was run through the building's walls. It was weird, but I didn't think much of it. My family was just special.

When I got to know Chrixten a lot better, we all learned that she didn't have a name. So at church she was christened with the name Chrixten. Mom chose the name herself. She thought it was clever because originally the girl was only assigned a number, Ten. Chrixten was known as the sometimes visiting prodigy child of everything, piano, dancing, sports, academics; she knew everything. She wasn't always around but she appeared often. 

 

Dia interrupts and asks, "is that so? So far she proves to be absolutely useless other than being a overzealous false 'hero'." While that is true, she's also extremly talented. Don't underestimate her in anything, even if she acts like she has no talents.
    -wait. How do you know her!? Dia ignores the question and continues her work with my arm. I grumble aloud. Something else...

One time for a concert, Mamma had all us girls start an A-Capella group. That was when she was pregnant with Jamal.
The "classic man". He's one and a half years younger than me, and, when he grew to the age of three, he started wearing suits and ties everyday. And he never stopped wearing them. Mom made sure that he didn't  dress too showy. She didn't want any of my siblings drawing too much attention to their appearance. Since they're unique and all... but, at home he couldn't help but hover above everyone to show what he felt about anyone: that they were and will always be lower than the great "classic man".

When I was around ten years old, Mom had a pair -er group- of babies- triplets. Poor Mom. Two were boys and one a girl. The two boys were named Nero, Nico, and the girl was Nekida.
   Nero was always a mature, serious, kid. Just like Chrixten was. He wasn't a jokester that's for sure. He also stayed classy but not as much as Jamal. He was smart like Chrixten. A very intellectual kid who got triggered every time someone says something stupid. Which is basically all the time around this house. He'd just read our minds and pinched us for our idiotic thoughts. Everyone except Chrixten. He only laughed at her's.

Nico was Le's greatest fan other than Chrixten. Whenever he can, he dresses, acts, and lives like Letrelle. It's absolutely insane and annoying. Even when Letrelle's in the wrong, Nico is always standing up for Le. His power was so pretty, he could make anything glow at the snap of his fingers. Chrixten saw it purposeless, but not everything has to have purpose right?

  Nekida, was the most angry child. She had always had something to female dog about. Maybe being so close to two boys all the time drove her that way, or she just is. Either way, she drove everyone crazy except Chrixten, whom she adores just like Niko adores Le. She could bring things to life. One time she turned one of her toy unicorns alive, it was too cool. But of course we had to kill it in the end, that wasn't as cool. Tensions were rising, and it was best not to raise them with things like that.

We also met Mom and Dad's old best friend, Darius Black. He was a very stern man. He was pretty nice to everyone but me. I just wasn't unique I guess. But he offered to teach us- them- how to defend ourselves. Our parents said yes.
He only taught the older siblings how to fight. With him, Chrixten mastered duel wielding swords, but she learned so quickly I have a feeling she knew before he taught the others. Letrelle could fight with a staff. Odessa used some kind of sharp fan. Renell learned how to use the nunchucks. And I- I dabbled a little in long distance archery at the sidelines.

Everything was so happy and life was content. I was the only child without the fantastic abilities everyone else had. But that gave me opportunity for Mom to love me the most, so I wouldn't feel ignored or hated. In addition to that, they mostly stayed at training too, so I got to spend extra time with Mamma and Daddy. Then, everyone was still aloud to go to my school. And things were going great.

Until someone got to Nekida. Nobody knows what exactly happened to her except...
     I shake my head. Should I even be thinking about this right now? I need to move on don't I? Isn't there a stage of acceptance? I need to accept what happened.
When we found her, she was stuffed with gasoline inside of her. It was leaking out her body. I guess they were intending to light her up cause we found a box of matches and the canister, but the culprit wasn't caught. Chrixten said there were other girls around Nekida's age. She had stopped them but she was too late. Being only thirteen and a controversial "subject of existence", nobody used Chrixten as a reliable witness.

Back to back they went Nico, Jamal, and then finally Nero's funeral. Each murdered by mystery men or women or kids. All hate crimes never solved. Chrixten one time was accused of being the murderer of them because she saw each murder happen, but she proved them wrong in seconds. It broke us all.

We were a quiet solemn family. I went to school and left the others behind to teach themselves for the days. While the days went by, life went on like a dull cycle of the same thing everyday.

One day, we took a trip to the nearby aquarium to my school. That's where I met all my current friends; we weren't exactly friends then. I honestly knew them for the things they did or what they had. For example, Clara was pizzaball Girl.  I laugh a little and turn over. It was probably wrong of me to take all her food like that.
As the bus made its first stop to drop us off, it stopped short at the end of my neighborhood. The students crowded up at the front view window and looked toward the smoke coming up towards the sky. Back then, Smogginson wasn't as big a Possessor. The bus driver tried to push the students back, but somehow I got through.
I ran as far as my out-of-shape-adrenaline-pumping body would carry me. When I finally made it to the drive through of my house, I saw the burning pile of ash my house was becoming. The firemen were dragging Chrixten out of the house as she kicked and sprawled. They wouldn't let her run back inside to help. She kept screaming "I can save him", but they threw her out. She screamed out to the sky and broke down on the ground. I fell to my knees with her.
   After that two more fire men held passed-out Odessa and Renell in their arms. Mom hobbled out after them with her arms wrapped around two more firemen. Le came out behind them holding Dad in their arms. Dad was knocked out too. He didn't move a muscle. He must have breathed in a lot of smoke, that's what I wanted to think.
I didn't want to consider the tears running down Le's face. I didn't want to think about Chrixten's unexpected break down and lashing out at the firemen, who had to keep her back. I didn't want to stare at the red hole through his shirt, through his stomach. I didn't want to feel.

    Dia nods her head. She looks deep in thought. "None of this correlates with the facts. If they were Stalkers, none of them should have been living there in the first place. They should have been outside the wall. What your parents were doing was illegal. Not only were your parents breaking the law but your class additionally was committing illegal acts under our supervision." She states and continues fiddling with my arm.

How could she be so insensitive about something like this!?

I slam my fist on the table and yell in her face, "shut up! Do you really think my parents are just going to give up their children and send them away to die. You have no idea about our situation!" She looks up at me surprised and quickly realizes what she's done. "I'm sorry. That was cruel of me. Being one who enforces the law, I forget my place in a normal person to person conversation. Here, finish with your explanation. How did you lose the arm?" She asks and smiles. "Please don't do that. Or talk like that. Or act like that. That's way too much like her." I grumble and start again on the story.

When we heard the news about the disappearing man, Mamma and I didn't think twice about it. We threw the paper to the side and ate breakfast together like it was just another day. We got a little suspicious when the enforcers came knocking on our door. "I got it!" I say as I run to the door and open it to find a man standing on the other side. He held his gun at a ready position to aim and fire, and it made me so nervous I barely was able to speak up to him. "Y-yes sir?" My voice was so shaky. I didn't feel calm till I heard Mamma come up. "Good morning." She says so confidently to him.

"I have received notice of suspicious activity in the housing and quartering of Stalker insurgents." The man declares and I can see the grip on his gun tighten and the emotion on his face completely drain away from his face. "M-Mamma?" I ask, becoming more frightened when I hear the shatter of her favorite coffee mug. She dropped it. "Are you- going to kill them? You swore you wouldn't kill them!" She begins to yell and swing her fists at him, but he doesn't react. "No, there will be no death, rather a new facility has been created to educate and domesticate the latter generations of the Stalker species. This organization will be known as SCIF, and we gladly welcome any newcomers." He repeats something probably repeated in the mirror everyday.

"Times up." Dia cuts me off and begins packing, taking the weapons with her too. "Hey! Where are you going? What about my arm!?" I dangle the useless piece of metal as I call out for Dia to come back. She left. How long am I going to have to go like this?!